Most of us look at child proofing like we look at an IRS audit: we hope we never have to go through it. If we do, we hope it only happens once. Have you ever looked around your once child proofed house and noticed the many hazards that have piled up like your laundry? As we do a safety tune-up (yes, even the Paranoid Sisters need safety tune-ups) we take you with us. 

As I sat in the Emergency room with my 2 1/2 year old son I had plenty of time to contemplate my safety audit. This month we focus on what it takes to be a Paranoid Sister.

On a recent outing, I had the intense displeasure of watching my son eating my Sudafed like it was candy. As I drove home from the emergency room with my totally healthy son in tow, I tallied up the mistakes I had made throughout the evening.

Upon arriving at my mother's I set my bag in a corner. I actually thought I better get that bag put up because I new it had medication in it. Just as quickly I thought Oh I'll do it later. Mistake Number 1. When I saw Jon eating the Sudafed like candy, I freaked out. Mistake Number 2. After getting all that I could see out of his mouth, my mother and I decided we would make him throw up. Mistake Number 3. After subjecting him to a toothbrush down his throat, we decided we would get some Syrup of Ipecac. At no time did it even dawn on me to call Poison Control. Mistake number 4. So, off we went to the store. As we drove, we debated the next best step. We decided on the fire department. They in turn called the paramedics and off to the emergency room we went.

Now my son came through the experience just fine. But I re-learned some very valuable lessons.

1. Get all medications out of the reach of children.

2. Know what you are going to do in the case of an emergency. Panic comes from the fear of not knowing. Take a few minutes and find out where the local hospital is located . Get the number for the local poison control.

3. In the case of a poisoning, call Poison Control. In California the number is 800-876-4766. Check your phone book for listings in other states. As it turned out, that is who the hospital was calling anyway.

4. Stop. Take a deep breath. Think. Seems simple but it is the hardest thing to do when you are in "the eye of the storm".

When all was said and done, while I was frazzled my son actually enjoyed the one-on-one time.

If you have any "I learned it the hard way stories," let us know. We'll put something together for a future edition.